Hi friends! So I recently returned from attending and speaking at my favorite wedding industry conference/workshop/retreat, Cultivate Retreat, and it was absolutely what I needed- perfect timing in fact! The speakers and sessions at Cultivate are a combination of inspiration, creativity, and education- the perfect combination if you ask me! This was my third time attending (and speaking at) the workshop, and each time, I’ve taking something different away from it. This time around, my takeaways were more inspirational in nature… more specifically, success and how you define it, thanks to a talk by my friend Shay Cochrane.

First, let’s preface this with a little bit of history. Some of you may know that in addition to running Every Last Detail, I recently embarked upon the journey of business ownership with my husband in opening a chiropractic practice. While the medical (and “brick and mortar”) world is way different from the wedding and web world that I’m used to, I’ve luckily been able to apply some of my existing business knowledge to the business… but I’ve also been learning a lot that can apply to any business in general too. My last post here on ELD For Pros was sharing a few of those thoughts, and today (goodness- 4 months after that post) I want to talk more specifically about the term “success” and how we view it.

I will be the first to tell you that I don’t like to sugarcoat things… and on top of that, I wear my heart on my sleeve and I’m the worst lier ever. (Sidenote: I recently put together a surprise birthday dinner for my mom, and I’m still quite proud of myself for pulling it off without her knowing!) I don’t know about any of you, but not being able to hide things has proven to be one of my greatest challenges as a business owner. And so part of the way that I deal with this is sharing what’s on my heart- because if I didn’t, I would feel like I’m lying by omission in some way. I’ve been criticized by my peers for being too open in the past, but I decided a long time ago to be transparent in my business, and I’m not going back on that decision. I wear my heart on my sleeve (and my face- hence the lack of the ability to “hide” things) and I’m not going to apologize for it. So with that said…

I feel like I am a failure.

A failure in business, because I’ve had to revert back to working until 2am- something that took me 3 years to STOP doing in the first place. A failure in having a home life, because my husband and I are living with my parents- because we are building our business and haven’t made a penny yet. A failure as an adult because I’m still driving the car I had in high school. A failure as a friend because I have no free time- and even so much as finding time for a phone call during the day is difficult. A failure as a woman because I don’t have children yet- because we’d like to be making money and have a home before bringing a child into the world. I feel like a failure as a 27 year old woman in general. Essentially, if someone asked me if I thought I was successful after thinking about all of these things, I would tell them no.

These things I mentioned above have been running through my mind a lot lately, but thanks to Shay’s presentation last week, I realized that they are all measures of “success” that are incorrect- because they are based on other people’s lives. And you know what else I realized? These “failures” are mostly all THINGS. Not experiences, not memories, not skills- THINGS. The quote that is below is quite fitting, and came at the most perfect time (literally- showed up in an app this morning!) because it’s a reminder that achieving goals and success isn’t about the THINGS- it’s about the experience, and who you become because of that experience.

I think it’s all too common for success to be determined in relation to what you view as others’ successes. It could be someone having a profitable business, traveling all the time, buying a house, or maybe even just getting a gazillion followers on Instagram. The list could of course go on and on… especially with all of the social media outlets we have at our fingertips today. But the thing is… you’re only seeing what people put out there (mostly good things), and then it’s all on YOU in how you see it.

So the question I have is: WHY are we using other people’s lives to determine our own success?

The problem is, I’m basing all of my apparent “failure” on what others have or where they are at in life. But if I look at things and base my success on my OWN merit and my OWN life, maybe I wouldn’t feel like a failure.

So I think it’s about time that I defined what MY success is…

MY success is having a business and career that I can do at any time of the day from anywhere in the world. MY success is being able to start a business with my husband, and be there to help him. MY success is being blessed with parents who welcome my husband and I to stay with them while we get our business up and running and pay off debt. MY success is having an old car that is still running. MY success is having friends who understand that I’m busy, and who don’t miss a beat when we are able to see each other or talk. MY success is comfort that we don’t have children to feel guilty about not seeing during this busy season of our life. MY success is that I AM a successful 27 year old woman.

I think being able to define your own success requires that you specifically do NOT compare to others- which in today’s connected world, is SO hard to avoid. However, it’s also a matter of being aware of YOU. Where you are in your life, what your goals are, and what is best for YOU. You are not the person next door… and thank goodness for that, right?

You are YOU for a reason- and it’s time to embrace that

so you can embrace your own success.

 So friends, I would love to hear from you… what is YOUR definition of success for YOURSELF? Please share below! 🙂

Well, it’s official. My husband and I made it through our first two weeks of owning a chiropractic practice. And oh my goodness- the medical world is nothing like the wedding world that I’m used to! I have of course been trying to apply as much of my own business knowledge as I possibly can, but I’ve also had to go back to the basics too. And as I’m looking back on these wild and crazy (and confusing) weeks, the things that stand out to me are more or less lessons. Lessons that are applicable no matter what your business is, and lessons that can apply to life in general…

1) Never stop learning.

Even if you think you know everything there is to know about your field or craft, you can always learn more. Be open to new opportunities, new processes, and new insights. Knowledge is the best asset to have.

2) It’s okay to ask for help.

There are always going to be people out there who know more you than know, and who have more experience. You don’t have to figure out everything on your own. And you don’t have to DO everything on your own. I myself am facing the harsh reality that I REALLY need to hire someone to help with my own business. (I can’t keep staying up working until 2AM- I’m sure you all know this feeling too.)  There’s nothing wrong with having help!

3) People always want the easiest option.

Do whatever it takes to make things easy for them. Make it easy for them to say yes, easy for them to provide you with the information that you need, and easy to work with you. Heck, I know I myself always want the easiest option too! 🙂

4) A positive outlook helps.

In a world full of negativity, competition, and comparison, having a positive outlook on situations can give you a glimmer of hope. Seeing the silver lining to not-so-great situations can be your saving grace. Not only that, but it really and truly does have a substantial effect on your wellbeing.

5) Patience my dears, patience.

Rome wasn’t built overnight. You have to be patient when it comes to building a business- and even in everyday inner workings. We all get so wrapped up in wanting instant gratification that we can forget about the basics. If you find yourself starting to become impatient, stop, take a moment, and remind yourself where you are at in your business journey, and how far you’ve come.

6) Gratitude can go a long way. 

One of the things that I’ve learned about myself over the years is that I love receiving gratitude from others. It makes me feel like I’m accomplishing something. People tend to remember gratitude for a long time- I know I do!

7) You don’t have to do things the way “everyone else” does them.

In a sea of competitors, you have to stand out… and if that means that you have to do something that is the total opposite of the “norm”, then you shouldn’t be afraid to do that! For some reason, my husband and I always choose the nontraditional ways of doing things. It’s not because we consciously choose it, but because it’s what feels right. And somewhere along making the decision to do the opposite of the norm, I myself experience SO much fear. Sometimes I even procrastinate in making that decision, because it ISN’T what other people typically do. How crazy is that?! I don’t even want to think about the amount of time I’ve wasted because I felt like I had to stick to the normal way of doing things! So don’t be afraid to forego the “norm” and do what feels right!

Clearly, these tidbits are really just pep talks to myself- and now, to you! 😉 And yes, I have definitely been repeating these things to myself over and over these past few weeks. But this is exactly why I created this space- to share my journey as a business owner with hopes that it could help, encourage, or support other business owners too.

——————————————

If you saw the “first” post here on ELD For Pros, you may have noticed a little giveaway going on! Well, I was supposed to announce the winner last week, but clearly time flew by and that didn’t happen. But today- it is! Congrats to these 2 randomly chosen winners of a banner ad on Every Last Detail:

a Rafflecopter giveaway
 

Ladies, I will email you for your ad! Thank you to everyone who entered the giveaway… and thank you for your excitement in this fun little journey of ELD For Pros! 🙂

——————————————

Okay friends, now it’s time for YOU to share… do you have any of your own business lessons to share in addition to these? 

Hi friends! Welcome to Every Last Detail, Insight For Pros!

Every Last Detail For Pros is our little corner of the internet to talk business, marketing, blogging, and all things weddings! I usually spend most of my time talking to and sharing with brides, but I felt it was high time that I started doing the same with wedding pros. Because if you’ve seen any of my personal Facebook posts, I have a few thoughts about weddings, marketing, and the like! 🙂

Posts here on ELD For Pros certainly won’t be as frequent as they are on ELD For Brides, but I will definitely post more often than not. For now, I’ve pulled over some of my more “business-y” posts from the main ELD site if you want to catch up with those, but I have more coming! 🙂 I would suggest signing up to receive updates when a new post goes live, and “liking” my new page on Facebook. I may have a few other things in the works too, so you can be the first to find out about those fun announcements too!

So with all that said, let’s get down to the celebration! Today actually marks the 3rd anniversary of when I went full time with ELD, and so I figured that launching ELD For Pros would be the perfect way to celebrate this little milestone! It feels like it was just yesterday, but at the same time, it feels like forever ago! Isn’t it crazy how time flies when you enjoy what you do?

If there’s one thing that I’ve learned in my 3 years of being “full time”, it’s that we’re all in this journey of owning a business together. This thought alone is a very large part of why I’ve decided to create this “space” just for Pros here on ELD. Because owning a business is hard, and not only that, but the wedding industry is even harder. I don’t know about you, but I’ll take whatever kind of help and support I can get! 🙂

Honestly, I wouldn’t even be here without all of you amazing wedding pros who have believe in me and supported me, and so I want to do something to thank you- something that will help you in your journey of owning a business.

So as part of this anniversary celebration and launch of ELD For Pros, I’m giving away a banner ad on Every Last Detail’s “main site”!

You can enter to win the banner ad in various ways via the box below, and I will be choosing a winner next Friday the 18th! Enter away friends! I’m only giving away 1 ad, but I may end up doing 2 if there are enough entries! 🙂

a Rafflecopter giveaway

I would really love to hear about your own journey in owning a business. What have you found to be helpful? Where do you want to improve? Comment away below! 🙂

All week there has been talk about love and hearts, and rightfully so, since today is Valentine’s Day! Between my rebrand, the new year, and moving soon, I’ve been doing A LOT of thinking- and so much of that thinking has come down to what is in my heart and soul. I’ve written a few “posts” as the result of this lately, but alas, haven’t posted any of them. So I figured what better day than Valentine’s Day to bare my heart and soul to you all…

Image By The Robinsons

As I close in on nearly 3 years of blogging full time, I’ve been doing tons of thinking, re-working, and reassuring. You see, not only have I been full time for 3 years supporting myself and my husband, but I’ve also chosen to take a different path than what the usual “wedding blog” path entails. Early on, I knew that I wanted my “audience” to be brides who were like me. Brides who wanted to know the facts, were working with professionals, and were spending over $20,000 on their wedding. Luckily, this was also the bride I worked with when I was planning weddings, so it really wasn’t difficult for me to pinpoint.

Since I have a personal connection to what I’m doing and why I do it, this also means that I have a lot of myself invested into my business. And while I’m trying to achieve something very specific, and so many say that that they appreciate it, there are still times that I just feel plain defeated and hopeless. I think it could be because I have so much of my heart and soul invested into what I’m doing, and all of the business books warn against doing so. But I know that I would have never have even started blogging if it weren’t for my heart being involved- and I wouldn’t have it any other way.

So now I’m going to be super honest and open (if you follow me on Instagram, you probably already know that I’m all about being transparent). Being a full time wedding blogger is not easy. When I started full time, I thought I would get to look at pretty pictures all day, write awesome posts all the time, send a few emails, and it would be the absolute best. It’s still the absolute best, but it has not been an easy road. I joke that blogging full time is just glorified sales, but it’s not a joke- it really is all about sales. I make money from advertising and marketing, and while it’s something that I truly love doing, it’s also quite draining and nonstop. But at the same time, I still have to go through submissions, send tons of emails, and oh yeah- blog too. (The funny thing is that the least amount of my time is actually taken up by blogging.) I now understand why most wedding publications have sales people, although I myself don’t think I ever will. Needless to say, over the past 4 years- and lately more than ever- I’ve learned that a wedding website is not meant to be run by just one person.

Image By The Robinsons

And for some extreme honesty now… the past 2 months have been full of defeat and hopelessness for me. It could have something to do with some big changes coming up for my husband and I- next week we’re moving back to our hometown for him to (hopefully) start his career as a chiropractor. It could be because I’ve been comparing myself to others who DO have teams running their sites and who have a totally different audience than I do- which I know I just shouldn’t do. It could be because I’ve been doing lots of research, and have discovered the reason for why larger wedding sites have so much more traffic than I do. While it’s been good to know and reassure myself, it’s also a little defeating for me- bittersweet I suppose. Or it could be that the “new year” didn’t quite meet my expectations. I haven’t been able to pinpoint any single thing causing my feelings of defeat and hopelessness- perhaps it’s just the culmination of everything.

But this isn’t me giving up- this is just me sharing. Because honestly, when I don’t share, I feel like I’m hiding something and I can’t sleep at night. Of course I’ll keep pushing through, keep trying to make ends meet, and keep going (or “#justkeepswimming” as I put in so many of my Instagram posts). Next weekend will start a whole new chapter for my husband and I (sadly, including leaving my home office above), and while everything is still very up in the air, I’m hopeful that this new chapter will be exactly what I need.

So now that I’ve bared my heart and soul, I suppose I can proclaim that it’s my life goal to educate and inspire brides. I started Every Last Detail with the hopes that I could help other brides avoid the same mistakes that I made when planning my wedding. Somewhere along the way, this goal also evolved into helping wedding professionals. Luckily, it’s helping brides and wedding professionals that keeps me going. There are so many things that I want to do to achieve this goal of helping brides and wedding professionals, and I hope that one day I can actually do them all! For the time being, I’ll keep doing what I’m doing, and keep pushing forward. 🙂

And so there you have it- my heart and soul on this lovely Valentine’s Day. 🙂 I’d love to hear from y’all… what is YOUR heart and soul? What keeps you going?

Happy Thursday everyone!  I just got back from a fabulous business workshop that I spoke at, and my mind is buzzing with all kinds of inspiration, ideas, and excitement. Today’s post is something a little more inspirational and insightful as opposed to the usual tips I share, but I hope you will be able to gain some useful knowledge!

I came across this quote by Karl Lagerfeld (thanks to my friend Ashley), and it resonated with me in so many ways. It’s so incredibly true, and it can apply to so many different aspects of life…

Illustration by Ashley Brooke Designs

This quote has a focus on personality, but I want to talk about the other thing mentioned- comparison. Comparison can be a good thing, but it can also be a bad thing. It can be a great tool to help you make decisions. But the trouble is when you start comparing things that really can’t be compared. I’ve talked about this when comparing vendors. Sure, you want to compare what one person offers against what the other person offers. But when it comes to vendors, everyone does things differently, has different styles, has different experience, and that is why it’s so difficult to compare one to another. You can only compare an apple to an orange in so many ways. To me, the amazing thing about wedding vendors is that they ARE different and unique. Not all brides are going to love and want the same thing, and I believe that one of the beautiful things about weddings.

So let’s move on to actual weddings. Between Pinterest, all of the amazing wedding blogs out there, Loverly, and magazines, brides today have access to TONS of inspiration. SO much more than I had back in 2008 when I was planning my own wedding- in fact, sometimes I’m jealous! But all of this inspiration has also caused brides to compare their weddings to others’ weddings. I compared my own wedding to others and ended up being pretty unsatisfied because of it, so I can’t even imagine what it’s like now!

I want to encourage you to stop comparing, and start letting your personality shine through for your wedding.

You don’t have to have mason jars just because 80% of the weddings on blogs have them. You don’t have to worry about the “right” way to do things. Heck, you don’t even have to have an actual wedding! Just do what works for you, what you and your partner want, and what will truly reflect your personalities!

And now I want to get a little more personal. I myself have the hardest time with comparison. In the wedding blog world, it’s really hard to NOT compare yourself to others. It’s also incredibly difficult when others do the comparing all the time too. I understand the comparison of numbers, because that is hard data. But the flip side is very similar to what I mentioned about vendors- everyone offers something different and does things differently. You can’t compare Walmart to your favorite local boutique, right? Beyond the hard data, there can more to a wedding blog. For me, I care about helping brides and vendors A LOT. Like the *sometimes-my-heart-feels-like-it’s-going-to-burst* kind of A LOT. And I’ve realized that everything I’m so incredibly passionate about all leads back to wanting to help everyone and anyone involved in the wedding world. Which is why, if you haven’t already been able to tell, ELD isn’t a “normal” wedding blog- because I share posts like this one and all of the other wedding planning tips. I’m sharing this because I don’t want you all to think that I’m just some elusive face on a website. I’m here to help, and I care more than you know. 🙂

So with all of this said, let’s end the comparisons and start looking at personality and uniqueness!

I’d love to hear from some of you about your thoughts on comparison… whether wedding-related or personal, what do you think?